Truly confident people are magnetic. When you meet someone who is confident in how they speak, comfortable in their skin and is able to use their vulnerabilities as a way to connect with other people, you can feel that magnetism. You may find yourself wanting to be around that confident human. You feel inspired and encouraged by them.
And after meeting that confident person, have you ever wondered how they are so... well, confident? Are they born with it or is their self-esteem something that they have developed over time? Is confidence innate or is it a practice that can be learned?
We did a bit of digging and came to this conclusion: being confident is certainly something you can learn. What good news! Keep reading to learn the 10 habits that confident people have, and you should too.
#1 Don’t compare yourself to other people.
Typically when people compare themselves to other people, they think of themselves in a negative way. They think, “that person has a bigger house than me,” or “they have a better job than me.” We bring ourselves down when we compare ourselves with negative talk. There is no need to compare yourself to anyone else - even your friends, siblings, or co-workers. The only person you need to focus on is yourself and the version of you that you want to become.
#2 Think positively.
At times, you are your own harshest critic. The things we can say to ourselves are thoughts that we would never utter to our close friends and family. So why do it to yourself? Being hard on yourself depletes your self-confidence. Confident people think about the positive, especially when talking to themselves. And remember, it takes just as much energy to think negatively about yourself as it does to think positively about yourself!
#3 Listen to others.
Learning to listen to those around you, rather than speaking just to have your voice heard, is an amazing way to build solid communication skills. Those who can communicate well have confidence and exhibit the traits of exceptional leaders. Learn how to become an active listener. Notice when someone wants you to respond or if the person you’re talking to just wants to be heard. Confident people strike the perfect balance of actively listening and speaking with conviction.
#4 Reserve judgment of others.
According to Forbes, “confident people don’t pass judgment on others because they know that everyone has something to offer, and they don’t need to take other people down a notch in order to feel good about themselves.” When you’re confident in yourself, you don’t feel the need to talk about other people. Remember that everyone brings something unique and special to the table, including you!
#5 Exercise and get active regularly.
Recent research from the Eastern Ontario Research Institute reveals that people who exercised twice a week for 10 weeks felt more competent socially, academically, and athletically. These same people have a better perception of their body image and rater their self-esteem higher, too. In addition to the boost of confidence, people who regularly exercise release endorphins, leaving them feeling better and more positive overall.
#6 Don’t be afraid to say “no.”
When you aren’t confident in yourself you may fear telling someone “no” when they ask you to do something you don’t actually want to do. This is normally because you don’t want to disappoint that person or you’re worried they won’t like you anymore. However, confident people honor, respect, and value their time. They are in the driver’s seat of their life and prioritize their needs and desires. So the next time someone asks you a favor, and you truly don’t want to do it, confidently and politely decline their request.
#7 Celebrate other people’s wins.
Confident people recognize that when someone else achieves something great, it doesn’t mean they are any less successful. In many cases, when others win, it creates more opportunities for us all to win. Confident people know that there is a seat at the table for everyone. Other’s success doesn’t mean your failure. Celebrating others helps you feel happier, more inspired, and more confident.
#8 Set goals.
Setting personal goals is a great way to help you organize your time and map out how you want to spend your days. Confident people set goals and make a plan to achieve those goals. Achieving a goal, checking it off your list, is a great way to feel good about yourself and to be proud of what you’ve accomplished. Goal setting can help you see how far you’ve come and gives you the motivation to continue growing.
#9 Focus on your strengths.
It’s impossible to good at everything. Confident people recognize what they are best at and play into their strengths. You don’t have to be all things to all people. There is a reason that people specialize professionally. And while working on your perceived weaknesses is not a bad thing (we can also improve and get better), lean into your strengths and notice how much more confident you feel.
#10 Take action.
Even if they don’t know exactly what they’re doing, confident people take action. The best way to move forward is to just start moving. Fear of failing is often what holds us back from trying something and confident people don’t let fear get in their way. Even if it’s something small, just take one step forward and you’ll feel more confident.
Maybe they’re born with it, maybe it’s practiced over time. Confidence is definitely something you can learn, develop, and continue to get better at over time. Confidence is like a muscle: the more you use it, the stronger it gets. And we believe that self-confidence starts from inside, deep inside your gut. So remember to take your Confidence to feel your very best every day.